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Rosemary Cauliflower Mash- A New Favorite

12 Jan


At our staff end-of-year party, a coworker made the best thing ever: a cauliflower mash with the taste of stuffing and the texture of mashed potatoes. It is as easy as roasting two heads of cauliflower and whirling it with some other delicious ingredients in a food processor. For the love of all things holy, go whip this up for your next meal.

Rosemary Cauliflower Mash


  • 6.5 TBS olive oil
  • 2 heads of cauliflower, chopped
  • 1 onion, chopped
  • salt, to taste
  • pepper, to taste
  • 3 sprigs rosemary
  • 1 head garlic
  • about 1/4 c whole milk or half and half
  • half stick of butter
  • ancho chili powder (optional)


  1. Preheat oven to 400F. Toss cauliflower in 4-5 TBS olive oil and season with salt and pepper to taste. Slice the head of garlic across the top so all the cloves are exposed. Pour 1 tablespoon of olive oil over the garlic and wrap loosely in tinfoil. Roast the cauliflower until tender and garlic until fragrant and soft, about 40 minutes. While those roast, saute the onion with the remaining olive oil until soft and fragrant.
  2. Place the roasted cauliflower in food processor. Squeeze out the roasted garlic cloves into the food processor. Add remaining ingredients and grind to desired texture, adding milk if necessary.

Feta Chive Cauliflower “Hashbrowns”

21 Jan

This post could also be called “The Time I Ate 6 Oz of Feta in One Sitting,” but as I am drowning in school work, I will save that story for another day (Care to chat about anticholinergics? Call your girl). I had every intention of simply Greek-ifying this ridiculously good-looking cauliflower-based grilled cheese, but once I sampled the “bread” I got impatient, remembered I actually don’t really love grilled cheese that much, and decided to scarf down the patties on their own instead. 2015 is all about living with no regrets, right?

Anyway, these are simple and so yummy. The “bread” is plenty cheesey already and without the round of extra toasting they turned out very similar in texture and crispiness to hash brown patties.  They also marked my inaugural trial of the Ninja food processor (vs my beloved Cuisinart), so more on that later. Do any of yall use the Ninja? Any fans out there?


Feta Chive Cauliflower “Hashbrowns”


  • small head cauliflower, cut into small florets
  • 2-3 eggs, lightly beaten
  • 6 oz Feta (I used fat free because I am powerless in the face of Feta… but you do you)
  • 2-3 TBS chives, finely chopped
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • black pepper, to taste


1. Preheat the oven to 450F. Pulse the cauliflower in a food processor until it is a fine grain. Throw it in a microwave-safe bowl and microwave for 8 minutes. Let cool. Put in a cheesecloth or fine strainer and strain as much water as possible out of it.

2. Combine strained cauliflower, 2 eggs, and remaining ingredients. If the mixture will stick together to form a patty, congrats, you’re done. If it doesn’t, throw the other egg in there and mix again.

3. On a parchment- or silicone-lined baking sheet, shape the mixtures into patties (I used my fingers and the back of a fork). Cook for 16-25 minutes, depending on how successful you were at getting out the water. They’re done when they are browned to your liking.

The Very Best Paleo Cauliflower Pizza

21 Feb

Last time we talked about cauliflower crusts, it was this one.  I love cauliflower as much as the next gal, but it always begs the question: how did such a great vegetable get stuck with all that blahblahbeigeyness? Y’all already know white ain’t exactly my thang (…), so I’ve spent a lot of time dressing it up (roasting it, casserole-ing it, currying it, mashing it, and fried rice-ing it, to name a few)–but I always feel like cauliflower is the black & white beginning of The Wizard of Oz… can’t we just skip right to the bursting-with-color Emerald City?

Turns out, there is a Wonderful Wizard of Whole Foods: apparently there is something called GOLDEN cauliflower, and it is awesome. I don’t really think the coloring contributes to any meaningful bump in nutrition, but it did inspire me to re-visit the whole cauliflower-as-pizza crust thing with EVEN MORE success, and that has to count for something, right?


I love love love this much-less-cheesey cauliflower crust. True, cauliflower is still a bit of a ghost writer in this dish, but the golden color really helped make the vegetable “look” like bread- plus, without all the cheese, the cauliflower comes through quite a bit more (in a good way!). And yes, this recipe has an absolutely bizarre ingredient–I, too, said, “Wtf is nutritional yeast?”–but it’s nothing you can’t find in a YES!, Mom’s, Whole Foods, or probably even Wegmans and it really contributes to a certain je-ne-sais-quoi savory factor–don’t skip it. But this crust stands up and sticks together so well that you just have to eat it to believe it. If even had that crispy “crunch” of biting into pizza!

photo 1

So just make it already… okay? Thankssomuch.

The Very Best Paleo Cauliflower Pizza Crust


  • 1 medium head cauliflower, grated
  • 1/4 c coconut flour
  • 2 TBS almond flour
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1 tsp thyme
  • 1/2 tsp garlic powder
  • 2 TBS nutritional yeast
  • 2-3 large eggs, beaten
  • your favorite tomato sauce
  • cheese/toppings of your choose

1. Preheat oven to 475F. Line a baking pan with parchment paper and put it in the oven as it preheats.

2. Arrange the grated cauliflower in a thin single layer and cook until JUST browned, about 7 minutes (check frequently). Remove from oven, put the cauliflower in a medium mixing bowl, and put the pan (with parchment paper) back in the oven.

3. Give the cauliflower a few minutes to cool, then remove as much of the excess water from the cauliflower as possible– you can do this by squeezing it through cheesecloth, a thin dish towel, a paper towel, or using a strainer. Yes, you will have to use some force.

4. In a mixing bowl (you can use the same one you were just using), combine the strained cauliflower and the rest of the ingredients. Start with 2 eggs and mix well with a robber spatula– if ingredients are well incorporated and resemble dough, you’re good. If it’s still pretty crumbly, through in another egg and it should come together. Form the dough into a ball.

5. Remove hot pan from oven  and turn out your dough into the center of the pan. Flatten the ball gently with your rubber spatula to your desired shape- it should be about a half-inch thick. Bake for 8 minutes, then add desired tomato sauce and toppings. Cook for another 2-3 minutes, until the crust gets golden brown.


Three Second Cauliflower

17 Jan

Here’s just about the easiest thing you can make this week: cauliflower that’s seasoned and browned to a perfect, buttery crisp. Yumcito.


Three Second Cauliflower


  • 1 head of cauliflower, washed and chopped
  • 2-3 TBS olive oil
  • 2 TBS ground coriander
  • 1 TBS ground ginger
  • black pepper, to taste (I used about 7 twists of my grinder)


1. Preheat oven to 350F.

2. Toss everything together.

3. Roast for 30-40 minutes, until lightly browned.

Can’t-Believe-It’s-Not-Take-Out Shrimp Fried "Rice"

27 Dec

There’s no run-up to this one: last night I made the most delicious imitation ever– shrimp fried “rice” that uses my favorite culinary chameleon, cauliflower, instead of rice. Don’t be intimidated by the long ingredient list– this dish is actually quite easy and would be great for a cozy dinner party on an ugly winter night. Enjoy!

Thanks to Tastespotting for bringing me this recipe

If you have two frying pans, you’ll need both. If not, just make the cauliflower and then the vegetables.
–1/4 c water 

–3 TBS fresh lime juice (to taste)
–2 TBS green curry paste (international aisle)
–1 TBS + 1 tsp honey or agave
–1/2 tsp apple cider vinegar

–3 c cauliflower, grated (about 1 large head)
–2-3 TBS coconut oil (or whatever oil you like)

–1 c carrots, diced
–1 c onion, diced
–3-5 garlic cloves, minced
–1 c shrimp, chopped  
–2 large eggs, beaten lightly 
–1/4 cup spring onions, chopped 
–1/4 cilantro, chopped

1. Grate the cauliflower, using a hand grater if at all possible (even I did not use the food processor this time!). Keep in a separate bowl.
2. Mince and dice and chop all the the other ingredients (carrots, onions, garlic, shrimp, spring onions, and cilantro).  Keep each separate.
3. In one pan, heat 1 TBS oil over medium heat.  Add the cauliflower, spreading out in as thin a layer as possible.  Cook for at least five minutes, or until it begins to brown.
4. In the other pan, heat 2 TBS oil.  Add onions and cook until fragrant and translucent, 2-3 minutes.  Then, add the garlic and carrots. Cook over med-high heat, until carrots are soft (5-7 minutes).
5. While the vegetables are cooking, mix together all the sauce ingredients. Now you have a delicious sauce.
6. Back to the cauliflower–once you have a good portion of browned “rice,” make a well in the middle of the cauliflower. Add eggs and toss around, until the rice becomes light and fluffy and egg is cooked. Keep warm over low heat, stirring occasionally.
7. Once the carrots are softened, add the shrimp and cook until done all the way through.
8. Add the cauliflower to the vegetables and toss evenly. Garnish with cilantro and spring onions.
9. Separate into servings and use sauce evenly among the plates.

Cauliflower, Carmelized Onions, Squash, and Cheese Casserole

18 Oct

Last week my unit had a comfort-food potluck. I had two heads of cauliflower in the fridge and figured I’d see what ye olde interwebs said about cauliflower and comfort.

Turns out, if you throw cauliflower in a pan with some caramelized onions, roasted butternut squash, and a whole lotta cheese, it becomes quite delicious. AND makes for a pretty nice picture, thank you very much.

I followed this recipe exactly (except I substituted chives for rosemary), so I won’t bother to reproduce here– enjoy!

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